Photo by Christi Vawter, Lucky Heart Photography

Are you planning (or helping to plan) a wedding and feeling bombarded by words and terms you don’t quite understand? Then you’ve come to the right place! We’ve compiled this list of popular wedding-related words and easy to understand definitions. As always, feel free to email us with any of your specific wedding word questions at info@myhotelwedding.com.

WEDDING CEREMONY

Aisle marker: something that marks the aisle that the wedding party will walk down. Examples of markers include petals or a runner.

American Processional Order (Traditional)
Mother of the Bride
Groomsmen
The Best Man
The Groom
The Officiant
Bridesmaids
Maid/Matron of Honor
Flower Girl & Ring Bearer
Father of the Bride and Bride (father is on the left)
*Remember that, in these modern times, you’re welcome to start your own tradition and do whatever you’d like! For instance, the groom and groomsmen can be staged at the front of the ceremony venue, or you can pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen to walk together.

Bride’s side: In a Christian or non-denominational wedding, the bride’s side is on the left. In a Jewish wedding, it’s on the right.

Coat & Gift Attendant: These attendants basically check your guests’ coats and also collect and track your gifts securely. In addition, they will deliver your gifts to your room at the end of the evening and ensure they have all been accounted for. See our full post here.

Groom’s side: In a Christian or non-denominational wedding, the groom’s side is on the right. In a Jewish wedding, it’s on the left.

Jewish Processional Order
Rabbi and/or Cantor
Bride’s Grandparents
Groom’s Grandparents
Ushers
Best Man
Groom
Groom’s Parents
Bridesmaids
Ring Bearer
Flower Girl
Bride’s Parents (Bride escorted by Father of Bride or both parents, with father on the right)
*For Jewish weddings, we love the saying ‘the bride’s always right,’ which is why she is on the right side.

WEDDING RECEPTION

Air Wall: walls that break up a ballroom into smaller ballrooms.

Escort Cards: direct guests to their assigned tables.

Guarantee: This is the minimum number of guests you guarantee to your hotel/caterer. Typically the venue will charge you for this number of guests and no less, even if fewer people attend.

People Clinking Glasses: At weddings, this = KISS. Clinking glasses means that your guests want to see you get your PDA on and kiss!

Place Cards: indicate your ‘place’ or seat at the table.

Send off: The term that is used to describe the goodbye as the bride and groom depart the wedding. Some send-offs are orchestrated with fireworks, while others are just hugs, kisses and well wishes.

Set: The set is the amount of seats set in the room. A hotel usually has a certain allowance over the guarantee that they will set for. For example, if I guarantee 100 guests, the venue will set for 3% over, so I can set up to 103 seats and will only be charged for actual seats occupied. So if only 102 guests show up, I will only be charged for 102.

Speeches or toasts: These are typically given by friends and family throughout the reception in honor of the couple.

Sweetheart Table: A table dedicated only to the wedding couple.

Vendor Meals: These are meals for your vendors, including DJ, band members, photographer, wedding planner team, etc. Most vendors require a meal in their contract.

Wedding Party Table: One long head table at the front of the room where the entire wedding party sits with the couple.

WEDDING DAY

First Look: When you make the decision to see each other all dressed up before your wedding ceremony and have it captured on camera.

WEDDING FEES

A La Carte wedding: The term given for weddings when everything is custom and not part of a package. If this is what you’re doing for your wedding, be sure your estimate from the Catering Manager is complete and includes any and all additional fees.

Audiovisual (AV) Liaison Fee: Some hotels require you to pay a fee for bringing in an outside audiovisual company.

Ceremony Fee: The charge for your ceremony location. If it’s a really unique location, you will most likely be charged a ceremony fee or rental.

Electric/Power Fee: This is what some hotels charge if you have a large band or a lot of lighting.

Food & Beverage Minimum (F&B): This term refers to a specific dollar amount of food and beverage that you, the client, must meet to use the space. See more details in one of our posts. Always be sure to ask if the minimum includes or excludes tax and gratuity.

Gratuity: This is similar to gratuity at a restaurant, but for receptions, it’s predetermined by the hotel and should always be included on your estimate. Gratuity = Tip

Hosted Valet: This is when you agree to pay for all your guests’ parking. Many hotels will include an estimate ahead of time and then your final bill will be updated with a more accurate count since some guests will carpool and there may be more or fewer cars than initially estimated.

Load-in/out: You will always want to ask about this detail as there are sometimes permits and fees associated with load-in and out.

Overtime: The charge that you will typically incur when you go over 8 hours of labor with your staff or past a certain time of night. Ask your Catering Manager for details as this can increase your final bill if you go into overtime. *This applies for holidays like New Years Day and increases labor costs.

Partially Hosted Valet: This is when you host a portion of the valet cost for your guests. For example, a hotel charges $10 for valet, but you are paying $5 of that for your guests so they are only paying $5 for valet.

Room Rental: This term refers to the rental of a specific space. Many ceremony locations have a room or venue rental, as do some specialty ballrooms.

Wedding packages: These are typically all-inclusive wedding options, but you’ll want to ask your Catering Manager if they include tax, gratuity, ceremony fees, valet and more if it’s not clear on the package.

WEDDING FOOD & BEVERAGE

Bar Package: A per person rate for an open bar based on a specific amount of time. This definitely makes the most sense for weddings with guests that like to drink.

Consumption Bar: You will be charged based on the actual numbers of beverages ordered. See our article on consumption bars here and beware.

Cake Cutting Fee: Some hotels will charge a fee when you bring in a cake from an outside vendor.

Champagne Toast: This is when someone raises a glass to toast to you and your new marriage. These days if you chose not to have champagne on the table, your guests will toast with anything in their hand, which is just fine.

Dry Bar: A bar without any alcohol.

Groom’s cake: The groom gets to have some fun wedding planning too! He can do so by choosing a groom’s cake, which is typically more playful and less traditional than the wedding cake.

Half Pour Toast: This is when the staff fills your guests’ champagne glasses halfway, which can save you a little bit of money on consumption or stretch out your one glass of champagne per person so that it lasts longer.

Hosted Bar: This means that you are hosting all beverages for your guests for the entire evening.

Midnight Snacks: These bite sized treats are delicious and can be passed around to your guests late in the evening. See some of our favorites on this post.

Non Hosted Bar: With this option, your guests will be paying for their drinks. This is the same concept as a cash bar.

Partially Hosted Bar: This is when you host part of your bar like water, sodas, beer or wine, but all hard liquor is charged to your individual guests.

Passed Hors D’Oeuvres: Bite-sized snacks served by waiters at cocktail events. See our post on finding the magic number of hors d’oeuvres for your cocktail hour.

Reception Displays: These are basically buffets for the cocktail hour. They are larger arrangements of reception food — you can see more details on our past post.

Signature cocktail: This is a specialty cocktail designed by the couple and served to their guests. Sometimes it can represent the wedding colors of just be made with liquors and spirits that the couple prefers.

Sommelier: A wine specialist.

Taxes: They’re something we are all too familiar with when shopping, and they apply to weddings too. You will notice there is state tax on your food & beverage, room rental and guestrooms, so budget accurately!

VENDORS

‘Day Of’ Coordinator: A wedding planner who comes in to assist with everything on the day of your wedding. Many times a Day Of Coordinator will start working with you one month prior to your ceremony and help with timelines. She (or he) will also be the go-to person on-site for your wedding day.

Hotel car/complimentary hotel car: Some hotels offer complimentary airport shuttles (and luxury hotels offer complimentary luxury house cars) that will travel within a certain radius of the hotel. Ask you Catering Manager for more details.

Second shooter: An additional photographer or cameraman who is on site to document your day. Depending on the size of your wedding, you may have a team of 1, 2, 3 or 4 photographers so that no moment is missed.

HOTEL CONTACTS

Banquet Manager/Captain: The person who liaises with the servers, chef, kitchen and wedding planner. The Banquet Manager will be at your event from the beginning to the very end, ensuring a smooth flow at your event.

Catering Manager: The person you will work with when booking your wedding. You will negotiate with them, contract with them, and most times, go through the entire planning process with them. They will also be by your side on your wedding day and can make magic happen.

Food & Beverage Director: The person who is in charge of all food & beverage for the hotel. The Banquet Manager falls under that branch.

Sales Manager: The person you will work with on your room block. They will quote you the rates and send you the contract for your signature.

DECOR

Charger: Also known as a base plate, a charger is a decorative plate that is set on the table before service begins.

Chiavari Chairs: Beautiful wood chairs that come in different colors of wood and different cushion colors.

GOBO: A lighting term for a logo or pattern. It can be custom made with your initials or be a pattern that is typically displayed on the dance floor or anywhere in your reception room that takes lighting.

Overlay: A linen that lays over another linen and is many times sheer or more delicate than your base linen.

Pinspots: White spotlights that target or highlight a specific area. Pinspots are most often used to highlight your centerpieces and wedding cake.

Runner: A long, narrow linen that runs across the table. Sometimes it lays over a base linen or, if you have a wood table, it just runs along the center without a linen underneath.

Up-lighting: These are the lights that light up the walls of your room and create environment and atmosphere. LEDs are most popular these days and can change colors as your reception transitions.

BRIDAL WEAR

Different veil lengths:

Ballet – Ballet length veils fall between the bride’s knees and ankles.

Birdcage – Birdcage veils are the shortest veils, falling between just below the eyes to the chin.

Blusher – Blushers are shoulder length veils.

Cathedral – Cathedral veils measure three yards or more from the top of the veil to its end.

Chapel – A chapel veil measures two yards from the top of the veil to its end.

Fingertip – A fingertip veil rests just at the bride’s fingertips when she has her arms at rest by her sides.

Different types of wedding dress cuts:

A line (AKA Princess) – A line (or princess) cut dresses are tight until the hip, where they open out into the shape of an “A.”

Ball gown – A ball gown is form fitting from the bodice to the hip, where it poofs out.

Empire – Empire dresses flare out at the bustline.

Fit and flare – Fit and flare dresses are tight until just below the hips, where they flare out.

Mermaid – Mermaid dresses are tight all the way down to the knee, where they flare out.

Sheath – Sheath dresses fall straight along the body.

Short – A short dress falls at or above the knee.

Tea length – Tea length dresses fall to mid-calf.

Trumpet – A trumpet dress is tight all the way to mid-thigh, where it flares out.

JEWISH WEDDING TERMS

B’deken: The veiling of the bride prior to the ceremony.

Challah: A braided loaf of white bread and usually part of a blessing by a family member prior to the meal being served.

Chuppah or Huppah: A canopy or structure beneath which Jewish marriage ceremonies are performed.

Ha-Motzi/Motzi: A prayer or blessing over the Challah prior to the serving of dinner.

Hora: A dance performed in a circle. Normally the bride and groom are raised up by their guests in two arm chairs.

Ketubah: A special type of Jewish prenuptial agreement / marriage license. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom, in relation to the bride.

Kiddish Cup: A cup used to drink the ritual wine during the wedding ceremony.

Kippah / Yarmulke: A small cap worn by men at a wedding ceremony. Non-Jewish guests are welcome to take part in the tradition.

Kosher: The preparation of food according to the requirements of Jewish law.

Tallith: A fringed shawl traditionally worn by Jewish men for prayer and hung over the wedding ceremony.

GUESTROOMS

Bridal/Wedding Suite: The room you will spend your wedding night in. Some hotels have special dedicated wedding suites, while others just make sure to put you in an upgraded room.

Day Use Changing Room: A guestroom you have for the day to get ready in. The hours you have this room vary by hotel, so check with your Catering Manager.

Early Check-in: At most hotels, check-in time is 3 pm, so if you are hoping to get into your room before then, talk to the hotel about an early check-in.

Late Check-out: The normal check-out time is 12 pm, so if you want to sleep in and take your time leaving, be sure to ask for a late check-out.

Reservations: The department you will direct your guests to call when they would like to book their guestroom reservation at the special rate you set up with your Sales Manager.

Room Block: This is when you work with a Sales Manager to secure a specific number of rooms as a discounted rate for your guests. Read more about room blocks and tips in our past post.

Room Drops: This is when you have items delivered to your guests’ hotel rooms. Hotels usually charge a fee to deliver these items. Most times it’s not too expensive.

Rooming List: A printout of all of your guests who have made a guestroom reservation under your room block. Ask for a printout of your rooming list when putting together welcome bags or notes so you don’t forget anyone.

Room Block Pick-up: This is how many rooms your guests actually ended up occupying in your block. You may have reserved 10 rooms, but your pick-up might only be 8 rooms if fewer guests decided to stay overnight.

Taxes: These are something we are all too familiar with when shopping, and they apply to weddings too. You will notice that there is state tax on your food & beverage, room rental, and guestrooms, so budget accurately!

Tourism Fee: A fee the city charges. You will notice it as a line item on your guestroom bill.

Welcome Bags: They are the best things ever! Who doesn’t like presents? You can see our whole post on them here, but basically, welcome bags are gifts your guests receive upon arrival. They’re typically filled with goodies, munchies, and wedding weekend information.

Time To Start Planning

Wedding Planning/Engaged

Steps: